your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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