i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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