I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
My butt remains clenched, sir.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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