Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Are my feet made of real feet?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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