i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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