Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
