please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
