I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
