So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
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Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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