she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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