ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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