their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
