There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
organizing the empties. That sober.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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