I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I could fuck to npr.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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