I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
A bitchslap is in order.
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