he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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