I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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