have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
How external is "for external use only"?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
You made out with two different species that night
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
