i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
