PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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