called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize