Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
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