she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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