I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
