Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
