I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
