I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
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the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
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I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
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