I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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