It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
