Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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