you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize