Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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