great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
So vagazzling was a success
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
