Grow some girl-balls and come out already
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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