i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
