Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
