WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
