Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize