I hope mine doesn't look like that
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
