Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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