The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
