I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize