is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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