Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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