What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize