can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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