So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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