funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Be still, my beating vagina.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize