Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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