It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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