I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
